Marrying well

“I married young and quick, from a place of love and hope, but without a lot of discussion over what the realities of marriage would mean.  Nobody advised me on my marriage.  I had been raised by my parents to be independent, self-providing, self-deciding.  By the time I reached the age of twenty-four, it was assumed by everyone that I could make all my own choices, autonomously.  Of course the world was not always like this.  If I’d been born during any other century of Western patriarchy, I would’ve been considered the property of my father, until which time he passed me over to my husband, to become marital property.  I would’ve had precious little say in the major matters of my own life.  At one time in history, if a man had been my suitor, my father might have sat that man down with a long list of questions to establish whether this would be an appropriate match.  He would have wanted to know, “How will you provide for my daughter?  What is your reputation in this community?  How is your health?  Where will you take her to live?  What are your debts and your assets?  What are the strengths of your character?”  My father would not have just given me away in marriage to anybody for the mere fact that I was in love with the fellow.  But in modern life, when I made the decision to marry, my modern father didn’t become involved at all.  He would have no more interfered with that decision than he would have told me how to style my hair.”

from “Eat, Pray, Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert, p. 380, Penguin Books 2006.

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June is traditionally the month of weddings in the Philippines, although it is already being superseded by December, so I think that the subject of “marrying well” is timely…

“Marrying well” is not only marrying rich.  Of course it’s the point, but it’s just the tip of the iceberg.  In its fullest sense, it is marrying a partner who has high career potential and prospects [ somebody who will be president or chairman of the company, CEO, COO;  somebody who will succeed the father at the helm of the conglomerate;  somebody who will start a successful, billion-peso fastfood chain;  at least somebody who will head the Finance department of the corporation…  correspondingly, somebody with substantial brains [ and preferably with considerable beauty ] to infuse into the genetic pool and to serve as a competent and suitable partner to her husband in his occupations and businesses, or at the least a trustworthy assistant in her husband’s business affairs; somebody who was expensively educated here and abroad, with the resultant savvy in the ways of the world; somebody who will bring her large inheritance into the marriage; somebody who will run the city residence, the country houses, and the houses and apartments abroad — with all their contemporary and old master art, antique furniture and objets, contemporary artisanal furniture, and all the other useless requisites of the charmed life —  to showcase one’s wealth and highly-educated, flawless taste; somebody who will look beautiful on one’s arm and serve — through her exquisitely-maintained, expensively-dressed, and magnificently-bejeweled self — as proof positive of one’s superior professional accomplishments, at least somebody who will produce beautiful children ], is financially productive, of good moral character, good manners, intelligence, and similar qualities.  Often, such a partner comes from a family that has long nurtured those sterling qualities and sustained those moral values through the years.  But it is ironic that often, such a partner also comes from a family that is tainted with inbreeding, genetic abnormalities, various health issues, inheritance wars, corporate struggles, endless lawsuits, kidnapings, if not outright murders, and other interesting and amusing attributes.  Last but not least, it would also be nice if the partner has good looks.  However, marriages to partners who look like aliens from outer space, with equally freakish characters to match, are very much tolerated and even desired when there are EE or USD $$$ billions, or even just Php billions involved.

Actually, I don’t know what to make of it…  “Marrying well” seems to be the furthest thing from the minds of the eligible bachelors and ladies these days.  Outwardly, great sex seems to be the deciding factor, but then one never really knows.  On the other hand, “marrying well” will always be the concern of parents, be they conservative Opus Dei, ascendant career professionals, or flower children, hippies, or even drug addicts during their youth in the 1960s to the 70s.  Because one still needs considerable resources to smoke grass, snort coke, and live an “haute boheme” lifestyle.  “Boheme” sans “haute” is “La Boheme” as in the tragic Rodolfo and Mimi of Giacomo Puccini fame, and that’s definitely no fun at all.

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In India…

“…   Soon she will turn eighteen, and this is the age when she will be regarded as a legitimate marriage prospect.  It will happen like this — after her eighteenth birthday, she will be required to attend family weddings dressed in a sari, signaling her womanhood.  Some nice amma [ auntie ] will come and sit beside her, start asking questions and getting to know her:  “How old are you?  What’s your family background?  What does your father do?  What universities are you applying to?  What are your interests?  When is your birthday?”  Next thing you know, Tulsi’s dad will get a big envelope in the mail with a photo of this woman’s grandson who is studying computer sciences in Delhi, along with the boy’s astrology charts and his university grades and the inevitable question, “Would your daughter care to marry him?”   …

“But it means so much to the family, to see their children wedded off successfully.  Tulsi has an aunt who just shaved her head as a gesture of thanks to God because her oldest daughter — at the Jurassic age of twenty-eight — finally got married.  And this was a difficult girl to marry off, too, she had a lot of strikes against her.  I asked Tulsi what makes an Indian girl difficult to marry off, and she said there were any number of reasons.”

“If she has a bad horoscope.  If she’s too old.  If her skin is too dark.  If she’s too educated and you can’t find a man with a higher position than hers, and this is a widespread problem these days because a woman cannot be more educated than her husband.  Or if she’s had an affair with someone and the whole community knows about it, oh, it would be quite difficult to find a husband after that…”

from “Eat, Pray, Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert, p. 239, Penguin Books 2006.

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Most Filipinos, because of their nonconfrontational culture, refrain from openly discussing the prospective partner’s financial capabilities in the light of a forthcoming marriage.  But don’t fool yourselves, because they certainly bitch bigtime among themselves in private… and how!!!  Of course they’re very, very, very concerned about it [ specially if the bride is theirs and there’s this impecunious, opportunistic, carpetbagging, “ne’er-do-well” coming! ], which is only normal for chrissakes, but they will go to great lengths to pretend they’re not.  You will hear such heartwarming hypocrisies and fallacies as “As long as you love one another.”  “Love is all you need.”  “As long as he provides for you.”  “As long as she will be supportive of your goals.”  “As long as he is honest and works hard for the family.”  “As long as she can raise the children well.”  “As long as he puts food on the table.”  Well, what happens when all he can put on the table are potato chips and sodas???!!!  And what happens when she decides she’s bored with him and the children, resolves to do an “Eat, Pray, Love” thing, and runs off to Bali… or to Baguio if she has less Php cash???!!!

However, some families are direct, and they’re usually the superrich ones.  As the young ones say:  “They don’t make any bones about it.”

The superrich youth are routinely sent to the Ivy League universities — Brown, Columbia, Cornell, Dartmouth, Harvard, Princeton, U-Penn, Yale [ also Stanford, UC Berkeley, Duke, et. al. ], to Oxford and Cambridge, to the Sorbonne, not only for their undergrads and postgrads, M.A.s and Ph.D.s,, but also for what is jokingly referred to as their M.R.S.s and M.R.s [ wives and husbands ]…

In fact, one wonders why there are few, if any, intermarriages between the last remaining Old Filipino, non-taipan fortunes [ although there certainly were/are/will be:  there is a forthcoming marriage of a Vicente Madrigal great-grandson and a Jacobo Zobel great-granddaughter early next year, January 2012;  Madrigal and Zobel were contemporaries — Madrigal was a self-made shipping tycoon and Zobel was a military career man from the distinguished Roxas-de Ayala-Zobel-Soriano clan ] — the Zobel, the Madrigal, the Lopez, the Cojuangco, the Ortigas, and the Aboitiz families.  One doesn’t hear of them marrying into the big taipan families either, in which case one will wonder who is achieving “mejorar la raza”…

During the various heydays of the sugar industry in Iloilo and Negros [ periodically interrupted by decades-long, near-fatal hiccups ] which created many of the country’s great fortunes, the sons and daughters of grand families ricocheted from one to the other, from one “hacienda” to the next, giving rise to the popular, albeit somewhat flawed, perception of aristocratic Ilonggo intermarriages and even “inbreeding.”  The Lopez, the Ledesma, the Jalandoni, and the Soriano families in Iloilo and the Lacson, the Lizares, and the Montilla in Negros Occidental were well-known in their circles for contracting “successful” marriages.

A generation of rich Lopez bachelors were cheerily advised by their elders to marry “beautiful girls with lots of money.”

A generation of beautiful Soriano ladies, all with a considerable inheritance, were married off to rich and promising young men of “good” Iloilo families.

The legendary Lizares matriarch “Tana Dicang” Enrica Alunan de Lizares ensured that most of her children married their financial and social peers.

A generation of Madrigal granddaughters and grandsons were advised by their eldest aunt that “It is as easy to fall in love with a rich person as it is with a poor person.  So make the right choice.”

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Manila is cruel in the sense that everyone knows, among husbands and wives, which side of the bread is buttered, more buttered, or make that generously slathered…  and the subject does come up during conversations, sometimes without reservations…

“Yes, Spanish mestiza, very pretty, even striking, but not rich.  She took all sorts of good, decent jobs when she was young:  kindergarten teacher, bank teller, etc..  He came sailing along.  Happy marriage at the beginning.  Now there’s just too much success and too much money.  As long as she’s Mrs. there will be no problems.  Even with all the mistresses she has to sit with through dinner…”

“Both grand families were very happy when they married.  ‘How suitable!  A wedding of equals!’  Big real estate married big real estate.  But there’s a glitch:  he’s a first-rate philanderer.  Doesn’t spare anybody, even ‘las muchachas.’  Has children with various maids.  She is in complete denial, preferring to cook her problems away in a house in wonderland…”

“You would think he’s so proper, aloof, and all…  No.  Like so many of his peers, he likes fooling around with ‘las criadas y muchachas.’  Has children with them.  Que horror!!!  But she’s not leaving him anytime soon.  Why waste all those Php billion Manila properties???!!!  She’s just making sure that none of his bastards will be legally recognized, despite the new Family Code.”

“There are all those rumors…  But I think they’re just mistaking him for his father, who was notorious for picking up the caddies at Manila Golf… And as for his wife, she wouldn’t know one from the other, and if she does, she certainly will never say.”

“I don’t know why she married him.  He was introduced to our group at a resto one night and he was some sort of penniless backpacker…  He even smelled.  Then he’s repackaged as ‘the this of the that’ and she marries him!?  Hardly ‘mejorar la raza’…”

“How can she allow him to treat her like that???  He treats her like a maid.  Sometimes, he’s embarrassed by her and has to explain to peers why she’s not from the ‘hood, although she is certainly ‘de buena familia.’  The truth is that no sane girl in his immediate set would have married him, cautioned as they were by their parents of his family’s eccentricities and downright weirdness.  Well, she comes from a crazy family too — her siblings are all rare birds —  so one of these days she just might casually walk out on him and he won’t know what to do…”

“When they became engaged, she was trumpeted as ‘la heredera de muy buena familia’ and his oddly bedazzled family, also very rich, pulled all the stops to welcome her.  ‘Que guapa!  Que simpatica!’  they cooed.  That was before they found out how fractious and leveraged her family was and she found out how miserly, miserable, and weird they were.  Now, it’s simply ‘No comment.’ on both sides.”

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Marriage.  As Tina Turner sang in that long-ago song:  “What’s Love, got to do, got to do with it???”

The whole idea of marriage is a tad complicated for my limited comprehension.  It is one of the reasons why I have opted to stay single.  All that winding and unwinding:  too many wind-ups as it gets on its way and too many wind-downs as it gets out of the way.  In that light, I’m perfectly happy with the comfortable menage a trois of I, Me, and Myself.   🙂   🙂   🙂

*unfinished*

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39 Comments

  1. isagani gatmaitan said,

    July 29, 2011 at 3:25 am

    caveat emptor on wikipedia, there are so many inaccuracies there that readers eagerly pick up.

    greece’s danish connection started with the ascension to the greek throne of george I of the hellenes, formerly known as william of the house of glucksburg. he was the son of king christian IX of denmark and brother of alexandra, wife of king edward VII of britain.

    constantine I, who succeeded his father george I, married sophia of prussia (not frederika). his two sons, george II and paul, both succeeded to the greek throne. paul married frederika of hanover and their son constantine II was king until he was deposed in the 1970s.

    george I had another son, andrew who married alice of battenberg (became mountbatten after world war I). their son phillip, the current british consort, carries the surname mountbatten which is his mother’s.
    as you can see the surname one carries is not exactly along patronymic lines.

  2. liz pengson said,

    July 28, 2011 at 5:21 am

    lo.. cikey.. I am sorting out my shoes.. so full attention wasn’t in my posting..

    so some corrections..

    something more frivolous..
    what else? so do forgive..

  3. liz pengson said,

    July 28, 2011 at 5:05 am

    now for real royal hunky punky.. check out t he life of the Prince Regent.. who became George iv..the last of the hanoverians.. his only d aughter died in childbirth.. why the throne was left open for Victoria.. he’s the one who had an affair with one of Princess diana’s grand aunts.. he married a german Princess who he loathe.. adored his only daughter..thoiugh..

    he’s the one who remarried having a morganatic marriage with a Mrs Fitzhelbert.. oh check that one one.. I think I got her name wrong..

  4. liz pengson said,

    July 28, 2011 at 4:56 am

    myles..

    thanks for that Greek input– I never bothered to check thatone out..but I knew Constantine is related to the Queen –why he lives in exile in england for decades now..

    No Iam not in the foreign Service.. lol.. something for frivolous like fashion.. but I have alwaysbeen interested in history & European royal houses &how yes.. they are so intertwined.. even Kaiser Wilhelm ii ‘s mother was Victoria’s daughter.. & he was in love with alexandra who married Nicholas of Russia..

    funny thing.. I was living with a upper class family in Kensington( they were Catholics & theywent hunting with the duke of Norfolk whose the Head of the roman Catholicchurch– remember the duke beheaded by Elizabeth !?) well.. we used to havelively discussions aboutt he royals.. & I did make this comment.. how they fought 2 major wars with Germany & their royals is german..mind you.. not so much anymore.. as George Vi married a Scottish woman .. the Queen Mum.. & Diana brought a breath of fresh English blood back into the royals with William & Harry..& Wiliam marrying Kate Middleton whose pure Anglo-Saxon.. so it’s good they started marrying outside of their usual incestuous ways..

    check out the picture of Queen Victoria’s funeral.. it’s famous.. all the heads of europe was in it.. all related.. then a few short yrs later.. they were at war with each other..

  5. liz pengson said,

    July 28, 2011 at 4:45 am

    Toto.. I will give a littlebackground why Battenberg became Mountbaten..

    around 1912.. when George v was on king.. Louis Batteberg was the head of the Navy.. there was great anti-Germanic feelings in england bec of the Kaiser becoming very aggressive.. they were being booed.. esp battenberg.. this was when George v & Louis got to thinking & changing their name to more acceptable Anglo sounding name.. let’s face it.. since the House of Hanover.. British throne was ruled by Germans.. as they kept marrying princes & princesses of minor Germanic duchies.. Victoria was the end of the House of Hanover.. as she founded a new dynasty with albert..

  6. Presy Guevara said,

    July 27, 2011 at 3:13 pm

    Myles, thanks for putting a cap on the European royal trail. Wikipedia keeps tract of that anyway. So here’s the question relevant to present times: What happens to marriage values in the Philippines now that they are debating acceptance of divorce and same sex marriage?

  7. Myles Garcia said,

    July 27, 2011 at 1:46 pm

    When Victoria married Albert, that Germanified the English royal family even more. Thus her House of Hanover (the so-called ‘no-chins’ of Hanover, Germany 🙂 united with, and subsumed with Albert’s House of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha. And that changed to the House of WIndsor, which, as discussed before, should also technically be dead now were it not for E2’s promulgation that her progeny be henceforth called the House of Mountbatten-Windsor.

    Liz, (so, were you in the Foreign Service? U don’t have to answer that publicly if u don’t want to…), here is how German royalty ascended to the throne of Greece, per Wikipedia: “The Greeks had risen up against the Ottoman Empire in 1821, leading to a struggle which lasted until 1829. Greece had been led since 1828 by Count John Capodistria, but after his assassination in 1831 the country descended into civil war. At this stage, the Great Powers stepped in and decided to make Greece a kingdom. At the London Conference of 1832, Great Britain, France and Russia…offered the Greek throne to the 17-year-old Bavarian Prince Otto of the ruling House of Wittelsbach, who became the first King of Greece. Otto was a minor when he arrived in Greece and thus a Council of Regents ruled in his name until 1835. In 1835, Otto began a period of absolute monarchy in which he selected an advisor (usually Bavarian) to serve as the President of the Council of State.”

    And then of course, when Constantine I ruled Greece in the 50s, he married Fredericka of the Hohenzollerns; so it was even more Teutonic than before and just as German as the “Windsors.” So Constantine I was an uncle of the present Prince Philip. Thus, the deposed Constantine 2 is his first cousin.

    Aside from Germany, Denmark is another one who farmed out its pretty little princesses to a great degree (for such a small country) to the royal houses of Europe. There was Queen Alexandra to England; there was Marie to the Russian (Romanov) Alexander III; and the present Anne-Marie, wed to the deposed Constantine 2, who of course, gained that American daughter-in-law, Chantal Miller (who married their son, the “Crown-Prince” to a non-existing throne, Pavlos).

    What I find astonishing about all these interlinked European royal houses, especially in Victoria’s time, is that even though they were all cousins, they still plunged their continent into that 1st great World War. I mean, if you can’t live in peace with your own blood relations, then what more with your non-relations? Of course, they say that you can choose your friends but not your relations. And with that, we can perhaps leave incestuous European royalty alone for awhile. 😉

  8. liz pengson said,

    July 27, 2011 at 3:03 am

    Toto.. I will give a little background why Battenberg became Mountbatten..

    Around 1912.. when George V was the king.. Louis Battenberg was the head of the Royal Navy.. there were great anti-Germanic feelings in England because of the Kaiser becoming very aggressive.. they were being booed.. especially Battenberg.. this was when George V & Louis got to thinking & changing their name to a more acceptable Anglo-sounding name.. let’s face it.. since the House of Hanover.. the British throne was ruled by Germans.. as they kept marrying princes & princesses of minor Germanic duchies.. Victoria was the end of the House of Hanover.. as she founded a new dynasty with Albert..

  9. liz pengson said,

    July 27, 2011 at 2:56 am

    here’s an aside: ge.. lol.. this topic is making me remember things..

    well.. well.. 2 of Philip’s sisters were married to high ranking Nazis.. I think members of the SS.. as when they were ousted from Greece..( now I have no clue why these Germans ever got the Greek throne..maybe because of that Kaiser Wilhelm II who was married to one of Victoria’s daughters? invaded & colonised it?..)

    anyhow.. after their ousting.. their mother Alice & Philip went to England penniless.. & Philip was adopted by Marquis & his wife Nadja.. & his sisters went to Germany..

  10. liz pengson said,

    July 27, 2011 at 2:50 am

    oops.. Prince of Wales.. I was thinking about the Duke of Windsor there awhile.. when it was his grandfather.. Edward VII..

    I have this wonderful book called the “Marlborough House Set”.. have had it for years.. what an eye-opener to the rules of the upper classes.. so when i moved to England.. I wasn’t gobsmacked by all their shenanigans.. way back when I knew Camilla was just Charles’ mistress.. & he hadn’t even started with Diana then..

  11. liz pengson said,

    July 27, 2011 at 2:45 am

    lol.. Myles.. I will argue with wiki.. as it’s Philip’s mother who was the Mountbatten.. he was Louis’ nephew..

    check out the Germanic Greeks.. that’s where Philip’s father came from.. Philip was always known as Philip of the Hellenes.. so technically that’s where the House of Windsor is leading to..

    well.. like I have already mentioned.. it wasn’t until 1912.. when the House of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha became the the more Anglicised Windsors. & if one looked deeper.. they are all descendants of the House of Hanover.. (victoria)

    have you ever watched the BBC series Lily Langtry? Louis Battenberg has a huge role in it.. wonderfully played.. he had a hot affair with Lily.. who also was a mistress of the then Prince of Wales ( later Edward VII )..

  12. July 26, 2011 at 4:26 pm

    Myles:

    Isn’t “Mountbatten” just the Anglicized form of the Germanic “Battenberg”? Same thing.

    Except the neo-N*zis like “Battenberg” more. *wink wink*

    Toto Gonzalez

  13. Myles Garcia said,

    July 26, 2011 at 4:20 pm

    Oops. Toto can u pls correct in the last post — should’ve been “Mountbatten” instead of Battenberg!! Dang!! This WordPress should all for edits!!

  14. Myles Garcia said,

    July 26, 2011 at 4:17 pm

    Liz, nearly all of that is written out in detail in Wikipedia. The point I’m looking for and trying to make is that underneath all the royal relations, titles, entailments, etc., if they had been reduced to commoners, the family of QE2 and Prince Philip should be known as Mr. & Mrs. Mountbatten since that is the patronymic line.

    Charles, Anne, Andrew and the 3rd son, all carry the surname Mountbatten-Windsor if not using their titles. So even though the Prince was known to have privately whined: “I am nothing but a bloody amoeba. I am the only man in the country not allowed to give his name to his own children.” It isn’t so.

    Per Wiki http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince_Philip,_Duke_of_Edinburgh, “the Queen issued an Order-in-Council declaring that the surname of male-line descendants of the Duke and the Queen who are not styled as Royal Highness, or titled as Prince or Princess, was to be Mountbatten-Windsor.” So his kids can still rightfully use their father’s surname, except ER2 still had to stick “Windsor” in there at the end…just so the “Windsor” name would not die out since there really was no more true “Windsor” male progeny.

    That’s what I’m saying. Kung tu-tuosin mo (If one were to analyze it thoroughly), the Windsor line (from the time they Anglicized the name) is technically dead. It’s only thru the Queen’s “hocus-pocus” that they pretend that that name can still be carried on.

    Charles, William, Harry, their progeny, are technically all of the Mountbatten line now. If historians had their way, QE2 would be the last ruling Windsor but with Charles, the House of Mountbatten begins. At least, that’s the way I would call it.

    So Philip should have nothing to carp about. After all, what is the only thing we can carry with us to the grave? A good name.

  15. liz pengson said,

    July 26, 2011 at 3:42 am

    an aside:Philip used to have holidays with his mistress & her husband. always titled.. taking a page out of Edward vii book .. something Charles continued with Camilla..

    oh Philip was always a busy boy– now he’s just old.. to fool around..

  16. liz pengson said,

    July 26, 2011 at 3:07 am

    ok I checked.. it was Alice who married Prince Andrew of greece.. the parents of Philip..
    Luois Battenberg.. was the first Mrquis of Milford Haven.. a title given him by George v.. he had 4 kids.. 2 girls..(one was Alice) 2boys.. George the eldest became the sec Marquis.. sec son was Louis Mountbatten.. Louis had 2 girls.. Patricia & Pamela.. ( I used to see them all the time– Patricia looked so much like daddy. their mother was Edwina also known to have had an affair with Nehru.. & Lady Pamela.. who is/was a sweetie.. so unlike daddy.. mother of India who hardly look like her parents.. being willowie & a muse to some fashion designers)

    so I should think. they are only into their 4th Marquis.. being a relatively new title.

  17. liz pengson said,

    July 26, 2011 at 2:55 am

    Myles..

    Proince Philip is a Mountbatten from his mother’s side.. Alice I believe her namewas..the sister of t he sec Marqis of Milford Haven & Louis Mountbaten..& she married the someKing of the Hellenes * I have to check my books for particular name) then they were the titular royal on the Greek throne until the Greeks ousted them.. hence why Philip ended up with his MOUNTBATTEN RELATIONS etc.(he was then known as Prince Philip of the hellenes)
    ,m,eanwhile..Philip is/was hardly ‘undert hesaya’of the Queen.. he’s known to have had so many mistresses.. & so many kiddies..why he couldn’t understand all the hub bub Diana made over Camilla..

  18. July 19, 2011 at 12:10 pm

    Larry:

    I’m still trying to put myself together to finally write a tribute to Don. I really liked the spoken ones of Peque Gallaga and Tats Manahan, and the written one of Joey Reyes.

    I’m in pieces. I know we all are.

    Toto Gonzalez

  19. Myles Garcia said,

    July 19, 2011 at 1:20 am

    OK, re the naming of the ruling house of English royalty. I had mistakenly said that the 3rd Mountbatten prince (referring to the ill-fated John). However, on further research…the current Prince Philip is a Mountbatten. Since he is the husband of Elizabeth, in commoner parlance and usage, he would be leading and siring that family as Mountbatten. I mean, if they checked into a motel as commoners, legally, they should sign in as Mr. & Mrs. P. Mountbatten; and all their 4 children are really surnamed Mountbatten–in the average person’s world.

    But of course, since he is an emasculated prince, therefore his Mountbatten lineage has been subsumed into the House of Windsor–even though at their wedding, the words “…I promise to obey…” were retained and spoken by Elizabeth II in her wedding vows and she had the option of not saying them. Thus,one would hope that it’s not ALL just semantics, lip service and smoke-n-mirrors..just because she is the heriditary ruler. Or was the price Prince Philip paid while marrying Elizabeth Windsor to be forever ‘under-di-saya’ of the Queen?

  20. liz pengson said,

    July 18, 2011 at 12:06 pm

    crikey.. apologies f or bad typing as I do it in bed..

    back to the Mounbattens.. nee’ Battenberg. Philip was the son of one of Marquis sisters.. who married a Prince of the Hellenes(Greece) when they were ousted off the throne.. this was when Philip was adopted by the Marquis ofMilford Haven (George) & his Russian wife Nadja.. Louis Mounbatten was Georges brother..

    and talking about this Marquis.. a little salacious tidbit about him.. he had a passion for collecting ancient pornography.. costing thousands of pounds.. that it was donated to the British Museum (library) after his death.. apparently it was so conphrahensive.. that it covered all kinds of sexual deviation including bestiality..

    his wife was also rumoured to be bisexual & lover to Gloria Furness.. it was quite de regeur during the period..

    Prince Philip was also rumoured to be the man in the mask during the Profumo-Christine Keeler Affair.. (hmm.. I actually I asked this gentleman who knew what’s what about this.. as SCandal the f ilm just came out.. I was living in London then.. so I asked.. who wasthis man.. without blinking.. Philip he said.. oops!) so he was into S& M.. shades of uncle..

  21. larry leviste said,

    July 18, 2011 at 10:53 am

    Don ESCUDERO passed on last week. He was cremated and had the loveliest wake at the Chapel of the Ascesion in Villa Escudero .

  22. Myles Garcia said,

    July 11, 2011 at 10:57 pm

    And one Leona Mindy Rosenthal married into the House of Helmsley and became the Queen of the New York Palace (Hotel); and later of the Danbury Federal Correctional Institute.

    It is rumored that Queen Leona I gave birth to her Maltese dog, Trouble, while reigning in the Correctional Institute. While the patrimony of the dog is not known, it is a matter of record that Trouble become one of the richest dogs in history when its maitre died in 2007 leaving some $12 million to poor Trouble!!

    Trouble just recently passed away. It is not yet known who will publish Trouble’s secret memoirs. Wikileaks is rumored to have the inside track.

    “Oh, ya go trouble…
    Right here in River City
    Begins with a capital T
    That rhymes with P and stands for Pool!!”

  23. liz pengson said,

    July 11, 2011 at 3:41 am

    PS: Marquis of Milford Haven was the title first gien to Louis Battenberg.. for service given to t he British Navy..

    mreanwhile.. Edward vii direct heir known as Eddie died young. so the sec son George came to the throne.. as George v..
    May of Teck was first engaged to Eddie but after his early demise.. she married George.. & became known as Queen Mary.. she was determnined to become Queen of Britain.. no matter what..

  24. liz pengson said,

    July 11, 2011 at 3:36 am

    about the British Royal Family– it was known as the HOUSE OF HANOVER until victoria came to the throne ..& becamekniwn as the house of SAXE-COBURG (bec of her bel;oved albert).. it was known thus..until around 1912..when King Edward’s sec son George V changed itto HOUSE OF WINDSOR..bec of the intense anti-Germanic sentiments of thatperiod..to make it sound more English..

    Let’s not confuse it with MOUNTBATTEN.. which is the family name of the Marquis of Milford Haven.. this was/is the title given to Louis Battenberg..famously known as lover at one time to Lily Langtry whogave him a daughter..

  25. isagani gatmaitan said,

    July 8, 2011 at 4:22 am

    some corrections to #13:

    the british royal family just before world war 1 carried the surname saxe-coburg-gotha, not mountbatten. the family surname was then changed to windsor to satisfy anti-german sentiments. the mountbatten surname which prince phillip, the current consort, carries was adopted for the same reason. his grandparents, louis and victoria (queen victoria’s grandchild) used to carry the german surname battenberg. elizabeth and phillip are third degree cousins and their descendants may carry the surname mountbatten, although some say it could be windsor-mountbatten.

  26. Julio Ledesma Arenas said,

    July 8, 2011 at 12:30 am

    On post number nine; I guess I may & indeed choose to amplify. It is related to comments 11 & 10. The entry posterior ie (8) is the ‘meat and bones’ of Enriques anterior posit. That is a True, Factual. Succinct and also the Tragedy of things even when they weren’ too Awry they still could get to be major Arays’ pun intended.

    This was a forbidden topic and yet my nature is that ..esse quam videri..
    to be rather than to seem should infact be APPLIED to what Was regardless. Still and also true is another latin proverb ‘de Mortuis nil nisi Bonum..’ of the dead say nothing but good. In treading a thin line I shall state as much casting no aspersions or intentions on those involved. The truth here perhaps is more FOR ME – SO AS TO SET ME FREE. Not meant as salacious fodder THEM.

    CANT BUY ME LOVE_ in my case & AS IVE PLAINLY STATED WAS/IS REAL TO ME. And understandably, flicked aside as ‘of course he’ll say he didn’t buy her love- look at them- ?creo tu’ …’ and so forth_ entrities flippantly discarded-jokes abundant. Unbeknownst that- IVE HAD THIS ALBATROSS- As BACKDROP. I GUESS NOW IT MAKES MORE SENSE – Why IVE USED RESTRAIN IN ALL MY COURTSHIPS-ALL of them regardless of WHO, As Ive shared with Boy Abunda the Sexiest part of Jules Ledesma is my brain. Lets leave the how for another of TOTO’s entrys_ How HE/ SHE snared……

    REALITY- IT WAS- so arranged, for the condition’s_ extant likewise factual. The amount of the ‘compact’ even today- ‘substantial’ I guess- then pre Pearl Harbor -obcsene would be more apt. I state this so as give context; without violating de Mortuis.. What did it eventually bring about- Happily ever after? Unfortunately (& perhaps Fortunately) not.
    It DID BRING FORTH ANOTHER FIRST- and this just and righteous-
    The FIRST EVER – Roman Catholic ANNULMENT in the Philippines. Awry verily.

    I’ve wanted to meet with My fathers first spouse; if only to be able to apologize- in person. And to Say that what was imposed on her then was not appropriate. In fact if I could be assisted in doing so on a letter perhaps that would be best. Again I wont venture further than that. I will say this though. Whats love GOT TO DO WITH IT? A friggin whole lot. ONE of TOTO’s and a colleague in the Sugar trades ‘ Epic story of Elopement with a relative a practice SUBTLY YET ACTIVELY PRACTICED UP TO MY GENERATION misogyny or as I said in jest – With our Clans .INCEST IS BEST.

    Thank you for bearing- with me- this is ‘catharsis de profundis. I make no case or arguments for THEM. I will say THIS- it probably prevented me from courting kin WHOM I WAS TRULY ATTRACTED TO and which wouldve probably been encouraged. But even as a precocious little bastard I already knew I was gifted & blessed. At the age of nine I knew I was also going to be “IT” of another quirk of families so disposed and with infirmities already stated- when I was born the stars were aligned and in families like ours multiple sequential inheritances DO occur.

    Marrying Well? Absolutely its easier to hurdle the kalabogs in a Phantom than a trycycle but as in all things- EVERYTHING comes WITH A PRICE. Assunta and I married thrice Civil SECRET(nullable), Civil Publicly LEGIT SQUARED(in Italia and RP) and in Church even as some kin said I had no RIGHT TO BE WED, being a “BORN AGAINST’ Forgetting that Ecumenical ties JOHN XXIII made EX-CATHEDRA THUSLY not EXCOMMUNICATABLE unlike the RH BILL to be going to Christian Service if I so desired.

    And if Jaime Cardinal Sin , the Ateneo and Bishop Joe Advincula and Bishop Cousin Tony were satisfied of my Catholicism AS SWORN TO IN ALL MY DOCUMENTS- again as TOTO said F^*k it all. And we wouldnt last six months uhh hello 2002 =2011 do the math. I might just marry her Again in La Fortunas Centennial to Rub it in that ASSUNTA IS THE ONLY LEDESMA BRIDE TO WALK DOWN THE STAIRCASE AND CROSS THE THRESHOLD AT LA FORTUNA.

    My apologies again and indulgence is sought. As already Said and thank you all profusely THIS STORY WAS MORE FOR ME AND SAM THAN them. Positive karma. And I would appreciate if somehow I could in fact sent a letter to La Senora de Elizalde. Who in fact was and is kin to my Father in Familia Ledesma Genialogia. I hope I got that right. I must excuse myself Im accompanying a Mayor of our District who is a victim of political zarzuela. Deo Favente Festina lente. sincerelyjulesledesma

  27. Myles Garcia said,

    July 1, 2011 at 3:05 pm

    Toto,
    Was just rereading the original thrust of this thread — and I know how it has deviated (but that’s how it goes in blogs like this), and you know what came to mind…the story of Rose (Kate Winslet) and Jack Dawson (Leonardo di Caprio) in that TITANIC love story.

    Yeah, nice and comfy to get hitched with somebody as loaded and connected as that smarmy Billy Zane character; but when the chips were down and the dice thrown, wouldn’t it be nice to go down with the one “Your heart goes on forever…” with? After all, we go around only once — and if you can’t follow your heart, don’t cry on my shoulder.

    Problem is, Manila is really so small and the gene pool of the “de buena familia” is so limited that most of the match-ups really border on the incestuous. Am surprised that there aren’t more 3-armed, one-eyed Down-Syndrome scions, the result of high-society inbreeding, being watched by their yayas and nannies, running around the exclusive Alabang and Makati malls. Or rmaybe that’s why there are so many large mansions? Do they — like the case of England’s King Bertie and his wastrel brother and Wallis’ boy-toy, Edward, who had a 3rd brother who was epileptic and therefore was hidden from view — possibly hide these less-than-presentable byproducts of carefully ‘selected,’ upper-class unions?? 🙂 (The 3rd Mountbatten (before they Anglicized their name to WIndsor) prince was John or the so-called Lost Prince. Talagang tinago nila (really kept him tucked away from public view); and the kid did not survive into adulthood but was sequestered by the cold-hearted Queen Mary in some discreet farm, until he finally succumbed to his infirmities and lack of familial affection. He was hardly brought to Buckingham Palace. Of course, his passing was a very hush-hush event amongst the royals.)

    Yeah, yeah…I know…the story of Rose and Jack is fiction and pure Hollywood. But given a choice with whom to spend one’s last days with, of course, it would be with the one who held my heart — even if all the material possessions and land titles and the Amorsolos, the Bugattis and Bulgari gewgaws were not there — after all, you can’t get them all into the eye of the needle that is the entrance to paradise. Why, even old Rose threw that gaudy Heart of the Ocean necklace back into the depths. I guess I’m just an incurable, old romantic at heart.

  28. Myles Garcia said,

    June 25, 2011 at 11:19 pm

    Joel, I always found R’s BABY so hokey. So,it’s sleazy in my book + you know I think Polanski making a “devil-thriller” put a black cloud over Sharon Tate and others in their circle. I mean…I don’t have to tell you what happened to poor Sharon Tate et al….

  29. Joel Cruz said,

    June 25, 2011 at 12:56 pm

    Myles, how come Rosemary’s Baby is a “sleazy” film? And before you might hit Google to come up with a witty reply, for the record may I state that it was a horror film, the definitive iconic starring role for Mia Farrow, and at any rate it was far from sleazy at least IMHO.

  30. Myles Garcia said,

    June 24, 2011 at 5:48 pm

    Correction on my previous post: the Dakota Board is NOT expected to allow a staffer of a former resident to reside in their (to me — old and UGLY building).

    Also, just heard: World’s #1 Richest Man, Carlos Slim (who is anything but 🙂 ) has offered to put up the history-breaking purse money of $65 million(!) if Manny P will come and fight (possibly) Saul Canelo Alvarez…IN Mexico City!! Is Manny the Man up to the challenge?

    Should that come to pass, Manny should move his deposits to offshore banks para the IRS cannot get their hands on his lucre — even though of course such a purse would’ve been earned OUTSIDE U.S. territory.

  31. Myles Garcia said,

    June 24, 2011 at 5:17 pm

    Ipe, thanx 4 that info. Didn’t know. I thought with a name like Hadassah Peri, she might’ve been more like an Israeli or Iranian woman. But lucky her!! At least her years of devotion and loyalty were generously rewarded.

    Huguette also owned 1 and 1/2 floors of an apt bldg on I think (am too lazy to look up the details) at 5th Avenue and 76th St., so the whole 8th floor, with 22 rooms, was considered the largest apartment in Manhattan. And I think that location might’ve also been the site of the Clark mansion, when her father was still alive, which was also the flashiest mansion in Manhattan — even more ornate than those of the Rockies, the Vanders, Astors and Frick! (U-know-who could only have dreamed of such an abode!!)

    I think when Huguette’s mother was still alive, the senior Mrs. Clark occupied half the 12th floor.

    Two other similar cases of devoted and life-long caregivers were: of course that Polish woman, Barbara Pliseckwa (or something like that…altho Ms. P actually did have a college degree from Poland) who ended up marrying (I guess) the main old man of the Johnson & Johsnon fortune; and more recently this guy from Nepal…

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/7729197/Butler-tells-how-he-inherits-multi-million-dollar-fortune-from-employers.html

    And then there’s this butler from Nepal who also inherited Ruth Ford’s apartment at the fabled Dakota apt bldg (where John Lennon lived and I believe Lauren Bacall still does; also the setting of that sleazy film, ROSEMARY’s BABY) exactly a year ago. I believe Mr. Tamang will have to sell the unit since the coop board will allow a former staffer of a resident to reside there. Tamang knows it and he’s happy to stay in his home in Queens. But very similar circumstances as Huguette and Hadassah — two unusual 1st names beginning with “H” no less!! Is that fate of what??

    As “The Jeffersons” theme song goes…moving up to the East Side!! 🙂 🙂

  32. Ipê Nazareno said,

    June 24, 2011 at 5:59 am

    Myles,

    The nurse of Ms. Clark, a Hadassah Peri, who stands to inherit over $30 Million from the Clark Estate, is an immigrant from the Philippines.

    Sent from the Philippines through a nursing agency in 1991, Ms. Peri has, through the years, received a house in Brooklyn and a country home in New Jersey, while Ms. Peri’s 2 children each received their own Park Avenue apartment — all from Ms. Clark.

    Ms. Clark apparently considered Ms. Peri her best friend.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/8594586/Nurse-inherits-21-million-from-reclusive-copper-mining-heiress.html

  33. Myles Garcia said,

    June 23, 2011 at 4:44 pm

    Here’s a link to the recent passing of one of America’s quietest, little-known millionairesses, Huguette Clark, heiress to a copper-mining fortune. When she passed away at 104 last month, May ’11, she still had an estate worth about $400 million.

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/43287522/ns/business-local_business/

    If you can’t access it, just google Huguette Clark. Her Last Will and Testament is also of public record. Clark had no children; but left some $33 million to her nurse of the last 20 years — NOTHING to her blood relatives. Of course, the WIll will be contested in court.

    Poor Vivian Torrente of the Safra case, I wonder what settlement she got from Lily Safra.

  34. Presy Guevara said,

    June 23, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    What is the truth about a parent marrying off a daughter in payment for debt in gambling? I’ve been told this happened in the past to a prominent family.

  35. Enrique Bustos said,

    June 22, 2011 at 11:08 am

    During the old colonial days rich families arrange their children marriage some rich families want to preserve their fortune intermarriages between rich families are common an example is the De Leon family of San Miguel Bulacan
    Don Luis De Leon son of Jose De Leon married his first cousin Teresa De Leon Sevilla daughter of Dona Valeriana De Leon Sevilla sister of Don Luis De Leon
    a half sister of Don Luis De Leon Encarnacion De Leon daughter of Jose De Leon and Dona Narcisa Buencamino De Leon married her first cousin Manuel De Leon Sevilla son of Valeriana De Leon and Catalino Sevilla

    **************************

    I would like to ask Rep Jules Ledesma about his father Don Carlos Ledesma first marriage to the most beautiful girl in the Philippines during her prime Susana Magalona it was told that their marriage was arranged.

  36. Sabin Arranz said,

    June 16, 2011 at 6:33 am

    Interesting observation. The Zobels and the Aboitizes are friends, the younger generation even more so (not our gen; the one of Marga and David A. / Jaime U. and Marianna Z.), but as far as I know are only matrimonially linked by indirection, via the Elizaldes and Ugartes. Interesting, indeed.

  37. Myles Garcia said,

    June 12, 2011 at 4:37 am

    I don’t know where to put this…but I guess this is as good a spot as any. 2 things that will be of interest to Toto’s readers here:

    1. I went to “The Steins Collect” (Steins of Gertrude) exhibit at the San Francisco MOMA the other day. Well, there was one small Matisse that was labelled (from the) “V. Madrigal Collection, New York.” So I guess that must’ve hung in Chito’s NY apartment? And the collection is obviously still housed there amongst the nephews’ or nieces’ Manhattan abodes??

    2. The current issue of VANITY FAIR (July 2011) boasts an expose on the lifestyle of Prince Jefri Bolkiah of Brunei. The article is called “The Prince Who Blew Through Billions.” It’s a wrap-up of the legal battles the younger Brunei prince went through in New York trying to hang on to what’s left of his billions after he and his family foolishly spent it PLUS after the Sultan and another brother, Mohammed, tried to rein in his excessive lifestyle.

    Altho there is no mention of Ms. Munji in the article (the only wives mentioned are the American and the Kiwi gals), it occurred to me how lucky for the Philippines that the Inveterate Shoppiatrix (Imierda) came before the Prince because compared to his spending, our Big Spender seemed like a pauper. I’m glad he came after because if it were the other way around, one can only imagine the heights she would’ve gone to, to match, top or emulate him.

    I also wondered…why for all of IRM’s dreams of ensnaring Prince Charles for her Hija Primera, why she didn’t go for Prince Jefri? Mas malapit at mas mayaman kesa kay Bat-ears!! But then he’s Malay at Moro. So Imee would’ve been only one of the cast-away wives. But then she would’ve gotten a handsome settlement.

    And then of course, he took his lawyers to New York court (probably in the very same courtrooms where the Other One was tried), etc., etc., playing the clueless fool as La Madame did. He lost; altho he is appealing that case against the British couple-solicitors who ran most of his business affairs from the late 90s to a few years ago.

    BTW, the Locsin-designed, Zobel-built 1,788-room palace of the sultan is described in the article as “…without equal in the world for offensive and ugly display.” (Of course, that would refer to the furnishings rather than the basic building. )

    What a lifestyle Jefri lived; truly the last of the Big Spenders…pero most of it is gone now. So for the poor folks, maybe you can just read VANITY FAIR online. 🙂

  38. Presy Guevara said,

    June 1, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Congratulations on another well written topic, in a style all your own – entertaining, encompassing, sagacious. You’ve brought out very good factual points. I’m sure there will be an avalanche of comments and many more stories to share. My father used to tell us when we were young: “Ang sakit ay lahi-lahi, namamana ang ugali”. He was of course subtly guiding us in choosing our lifetime partners. I am grateful his advice rang well.

  39. June 1, 2011 at 1:54 pm

    whatsaysyou:

    Please be reminded:

    From now on, comments with no real names, no email addresses that can be confirmed, and no reliable identity checks will no longer be allowed.

    Please upload your comment again with the pertinent information.

    Thank you.

    Toto Gonzalez


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