Sadness inside

I was outwardly the usual fun and insouciant Toto Gonzalez today, but I was bleeding inside…

I was busy working at 3:00 p.m. when I received a call on the cellphone from dear Tita Leonie G. informing me that a dear, still-youthful 61 year-old friend, a cousin of my Gonzalez-Gala first cousins, had finally succumbed at 2:00 p.m. from a major stroke she suffered three days ago.  She collapsed inside the elevator of the Rockwell condominium she was staying in, just as she was leaving for the NAIA international airport for her return trip to the USA, was rushed comatose to the Makati Medical Center but the traffic between Rockwell and Makati Med took ages, and was diagnosed as a severe case upon arrival at the MMC Emergency Room.

Tonight at a magnificent dinner in the residence of an Iloilo lawyer and sugar baron, I learned that another dear 54 year-old friend, who was diagnosed with cancer in August 2009, had had an operation that was not successful.  His doctors have given him the usual time frame.  Thankfully, he has an indomitably sunny, optimistic attitude and will seek other avenues of treatment.  We, his friends, are all rallying for him.

Despite the merry and very social company, I almost broke out in tears over the sad news even with the perfectly-executed “Profiteroles au Chocolat”  by Chef Jessie S. and the absolutely lovely “Chateau d’Yquem,” served on “Bernardaud” Limoges china and “Waterford” crystal, amidst magnificent 18th century/1700s Filipino colonial silver and ravishing flowers from the chichi “Mabolo,” all on the renowned 19th century “Baboy Damo” [ “Wild Boar” ] dining table of “narra” wood from Leyte province…

It was all too much sad news for one day.  Too much.   😦   😦   😦


  1. February 24, 2010 at 6:55 pm

    That’s beautiful, Larry. Thank you. 🙂

  2. February 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    PAEJ is a valiant warrior and will fight his cancer to triumph. His uncles and aunts are pouring out all resources for the latest stem cell treatment. I believe with all this New Age updated meds, our mutual friend will beat the cancer.

    I spent my birthday with him in their country house and saw for myself his vim, vigor, vitality, and strength that will keep us all strong to rally around him.

    But I know, when I go home I collapse like a marionette whose strings were severed and sob uncontrollably.

    I I remember what my sainted grandma said, ” Only when we are perfect in GOD’S eyes does he call us to come home to his House with many Palaces. ”

    ” Knowing when to leave can be the smartest thing that any man can learn .”

  3. Josh Moya said,

    February 22, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    Look at the bright side… at least she is now on a better place than we. 🙂

  4. Naty Eleazar said,

    February 21, 2010 at 4:10 pm

    I know Toto… I am a cousin of Ampy too and I was saddened by the news…. too bad there was no wake; would have wanted to say my last goodbye to her.

  5. Presy Guevara said,

    February 20, 2010 at 3:27 am

    It’s alright to cry, Toto, even for men.

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